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Sep 012011

The Olympians It’s 2012 and it’s the Olympics in London, A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman want to get in, but they haven’t got tickets. The Scotsman picks up a manhole []

The game show contestant was only 200 points behind the leader and was about to answer the final question ” worth 500 points! “To be today’s champion,” the show’s smiling host intoned, “name []

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. “In honor of this holy season,” Saint Peter said, “you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas []

E. Perkins Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and says to the first man he meets, “Do you want to go to heaven?” The man said, “I do, Father.” The priest said, []

E. Perkins An American golfer playing in Ireland hooked his drive into the woods. Looking for his ball, he found a little Leprechaun flat on his back, a big bump on his []

There was this fella with a parrot. His parrot would swear for five minutes straight without repeating himself. Trouble is, the guy who owns him is a quiet, conservative type, and this bird’s foul []

An old man and woman were married for many years, even though they hated each other. When they had a confrontation, screaming and yelling could be heard deep into the night. The []

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife []

A thief broke into the local police station and stole all the toilets and urinals, leaving no clues. A spokesperson was quoted as saying, “We have absolutely nothing to go on.”

A man rushed into a busy doctor’s office and shouted “Doctor! I think I’m skrinking!!” The doctor calmly responded, “Now settle down. You’ll just have to be a little patient.”

from Conny Cones Sister Mary ran out of gas. She walked to the station to borrow a gas can and buy some gas. The attendant told her that the only gas can []

sent by B. Obama Bill and Hillary are at the Yankee season opener sitting in the in the first row, with the Secret Service agents directly behind them. One of the Secret []

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